Wednesday, April 2, 2014


One interesting question came into my mind the other day, let me share it with you.

Is it wrong to tell all our problems to another person ?

At face value, this seems to be a simple enough question and most of you would say "No of course not, that's what friends are there for"

But think a bit deeper. Why do we want to pour out a problems to others, to a friend or a person we love or whoever. Maybe because it makes us feel better to "share" our problems or maybe to see if the other person  can suggest a solution or it may even be to get some old fashion sympathy :)

All of these are very very selfish reasons. Think for a minute.

It results in the other person becoming worried in one way or another. It suddenly dawned on me that this too is a sin. We are inflicting pain on another person. Its as simple as that. We as human beings have absolutely no right to willfully cause harm of any kind to others. Therefore learn to keep your problems to yourself as you certainly have no right to relate them to others.

Tough ? I know :)

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Hello darkness my old friend .. I came to talk to you again :)

Hi to everybody.
Sorry for the long delay between this and my last post. Also for the missing posts. I had some technical glitches that resulted in some of the previous stuff getting deleted. Thanks for the emails guys , I am alive and well :)

Obviously most of our troubles are the results of our own actions. We all know that. Most. It is really meaningless to blame others for what are ultimately our own failings. Man is a imperfect creation and I see no reason why we should deny accepting that most of the experiences we face are the direct result of our own actions.

Cause and effect as explained so well by the Buddha. Karma. Most of what we do , we do for our own selfish reasons. Ok we may try to con ourselves into believing otherwise but it mostly just us :)
And obviously we have to pay for our little pleasures , the little moments of happiness that are sprinkled through our lives. The one thing I have learnt about life ( other than it goes on :) ) is that you have to pay. This my friends is the universal truth. You have to pay for the pleasures. I suppose some more than others. I don't think that there is any balance to this arrangement. Some people pay more for less others pay less for more , at least that's the way I see it.

But is this fair , you may ask ? Obviously not. But then think for a moment , fairness is just a little concept that exists in human reality. It does not exist in animal reality  or the reality of the trees , the wind the stars (if such a thing exists).

Its funny because I know a lot of intelligent people who don't seems to see this. For example many intelligent people are atheists , ridiculing the concept of God. A very human concept they say. I tend to agree with them. But so is the  'Justice' just a concept that has no real meaning.

So if there is no justice what can you expect in this life ? Good question. Nothing much I'm afraid. Expect that those who commit crimes will go unpunished , those who do good will be reviled , ridiculed. Those you love will hate you. Expect these things.

And all types of expectation will result in suffering and must be avoided at all cost. Expectation  of love from you parents, expectation of faithfulness from friends and family, expectation of gratitude from those you help etc.

However don't assume that once you understand this, and have no expectations at all that should will be able to go through life without suffering. This is as far from the truth as a pig on the farm is from reaching old age. Expectation is one of the mothers of suffering (unfortunately it has several mums)

Even with understanding, being human, we tend to hope. "Hope" that other killer of reason. We hope that it will be different for us. Why because we are more deserving , better  , different  :) But it never is. Because all other things are irrelevant. Even if you are an angel , all your good deeds :) , your plus points have no bearing. The equation is Expectation = Suffering , variables like "good deeds" are not a part of the formula.  

So how do you control your expectations ?
Yeah that's the question. I don't know :)  But I can only tell you my experiences. Having lived a life far from average , I've developed some ground rules to get me through this. While I cant mention all of them here , I will mention some which may be of help to you.

Reduce Social Interaction : Try to avoid socializing , this is a potential can of worms. The more you engage in meaningless social activities the possibility of suffering increases. Learn to be satisfied with your own company. After all that's all you have.

Watch out for weakness in your thinking : Sometimes when you a specially down, your mind loses discipline, makes you think thoughts you know would cause pain and suffering.  It could be to rob some thing if you are hungry , kill someone because they annoy you or make your life difficult or love someone because you see something in some one you think is better than the rest. This is a major source of suffering.

Punish your self : If you do make a mistake and slip up. When the suffering comes, punish your self. This actually makes the suffering more bearable. What type of punishment ? That depends on you. Something simple but appropriate to the occasion. Deny your self some thing you really like for a period of time. Like become a vegetarian for a while even if you like meat or stop watching movies or
reading books for six months if that's what you do. It is pretty hard if these are the few things that help you to keep going , but it makes sure that you will never make that mistake again.

ok good luck till next time.  



Monday, July 22, 2013

Handling Reality

Ive been thinking about whats the best way one can handle reality. After all one must survive in it at least some of the time. Ive been studying various different "test subjects" if you will.
Actually you can find many different techniques that people use (mostly unconsciously). Here are some type I spotted

The Joker

These guys laugh at every thing. Them selves included. Their life is spent laughing away at various things , events and thoughts that cross their minds. These guys don't seems to be doing this when they are alone, they need other to listen to their jokes. They seek out and spend as much time as possible with friends. Be kind to these guys , they need attention.. without it reality comes crashing in and kills them.

The Worker

These guys simply try to forget reality by working. Most workaholics have other problems they are trying to forget. So next time you see the office work addict may be you should pity the guy rather than grumble that he is just trying to please the boss.

The Do Good'er

The dogooder is the kindhearted good Samaritan. They do good at every turn. Bask in all the good will people project towards them. These are mostly older folk. As you grow older some of us begin to have regrets

Friday, June 24, 2011

you see...

“One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers precisely what it has promised. Betrayal, though ... betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope.”

Steven Deitz

check this out it's awesome

Friday, June 3, 2011


The other day a friend pointed out a interesting fact. Buddhism can be learnt in two ways. One is understanding. This is where a person grasps the LOGIC of Buddha's teachings. One can ,(if you have the IQ and also the determination) understand the human state and the principle of cause and effect that he has so beautifully explained. However one may not REALISE the truth ! fir this There must be a all engulfing , all encompassing need ....
Without this your learning is incomplete..

WAK8RE5VDMZ7 day a friend pointed out a interesting fact. Buddhism can be learnt in two ways. One is understanding. This is where a person grasps the LOGIC of Buddha's teachings. One can ,(if you have the IQ and also the determination) understand the of the human state and principle of cause and effect that he has so beautifully explained. However one may not REALISE the truth ! The need ....
Without this your learning is incomplete..

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

kids stuff

hey lets talk about the good things in life. For me it's kids. Kids are unspoilt, they have no ulterior motives. They live in a wonderful world where dad and mum are perfect , the super heroes ... I feel that this does rub off on some people. They strive to reach a higher level, you know ... "try to live up to it" be more disciplined more hardworking. Haven't you heard of people how change their lifestyle completely when they got kids?. I have .